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We follow a qualitative research strategy that relies on different types of data: At first, the major dating sites in Switzerland were analyzed by means of an online ethnography and content analysis.
Then, we conducted several in-depth interviews up to 2. Until now, 12 interviews with men and women aged between 20 and 53 have been analyzed extensively, following the methodology of case-studies and grounded theory.
All in all, about 25 interviews are planned until the middle of In addition to that, statistical data from several market research companies and results from other scientific studies have been collected and analyzed with regard to our research questions. For more information about the project please visit our blog www. Zeitschrift für Familienforschung, Love and the market as opposite spheres in modernity It is striking to see how most writers of classic sociological literature have systematically opposed two kinds of relationships, that is love and intimacy on the one hand, the market and instrumental relations on the other.
The social sphere of intimate relationships of care and love as well as the family has been conceptualized in opposition to — sometimes even as a refuge from — the formal relationships that dominate the economic realm of the mar- ket. This conceptual opposition is not only based on theoretical considerations, but also on specific social transformations in the process of modernization.
While the public sphere has been increasingly dominated by formal relationships, instrumental rationality, bureaucracy and technology, contrastingly, romantic love and the values of personal intimacy, self- disclosure, mutual care and interpersonal recognition have gained importance in the pri- vate sphere Honneth Das bedrohte Ich rettet sich in die Liebe.
Voirol: Online dating: The tensions between romantic love and economic rationalization features of the two distinct normative principles, which relate to the spheres of love and market.
In order to do so, it is helpful to point out three basic characteristics in which both principles are most radically opposed to each other. The principles of love and the market each constitute a relationship that substantially differs, first, in the way the subjects in- volved are constructed; second, in the motives and aims, which are generally assumed by the participants, and third in the level of abstraction that is characteristic for this type of interaction.
An inter- subjective dimension appears in the love relationship, between interdependent beings, which creates an open-mindedness of the subject towards the other as well as an expecta- tion of reciprocity from the other Benjamin ; Honneth As we will see later, self-disclosure plays a crucial role in the establishment of this particular form of intersub- jectivity. The second feature deals with the autonomous nature of the relation and the exclusion of external factors.
in the love relationship is problematic and most likely to be criticized. At third, it is important to express the singular and irreplaceable nature of the other in the love relationship. The market subject is an isolated, egotist and auto-referential subject. Thus, this calculating and auto-sufficient actor takes for granted that the others show the same calculating attitude. The market exchange presumes a relation existing for the ex- change and in the moment of the exchange only.
Submitted to the market, the relation is determined by a purpose external to its social dimension, according to the heteronymous nature of the relation. A participant introducing social considerations in the exchange re- lation questions this exogenous trait of the exchange, namely, the normative principle of the market supposes a norm outside the social field.
At third, the relation specific to market is impersonal and abstract — it does not imply singular beings with affective strings. Finally, only private ends determine market processes, erasing social bonds.
One has to keep in mind, though, that these normative principles have never been fully realized in the history of modern so- ciety. At the same time, market relationships in modern society are not only governed by strictly rational forms of exchange, but also include a symbolic dimension and emotions as well as ele- ments of a gift economy.
Generally speaking, the normative principles of love and the market do not always fully correspond with the actual social practices in the respective fields. But still, these norms have a strong guiding force. As we have seen with feminism,. Voirol: Online dating: The tensions between romantic love and economic rationalization they can serve as a base for criticism, which points to the discrepancy between the general ideal and the actual practice in a certain social sphere.
If this criticism is successful, it also reaffirms the norm in question. In recent times, there have been developments that seem to strengthen the boundaries between the social spheres of love and the market as well as processes, which tend to blur these distinctions.
Since the late s, the structure of the family and of couple relation- ships has fundamentally changed. By calling attention to the needs or wishes derived from the romantic ideal that the institutionalized practice of intimate relationships has hitherto failed to fulfill, social movements have criticized the traditional model of the bourgeois family, contributing to a deinstitutionalization of the nuclear family Bernier ; Chaumier In addition to this, social and economic transformations have enabled a greater social mobility of individuals.
This and the general rise of incomes have signifi- cantly diminished the social and economic constraints of couple formation, giving people more freedom to follow their own feelings in the choice of a partner. As a result, emo- tional quality and sexual attraction have significantly gained importance in contemporary love relationships Giddens chap.
In general, these trends can be interpreted as a reinforcement of the romantic ideal of love and a strength- ening of the boundaries between intimate relationships and other social spheres. But there are also developments pointing in the opposite direction. In contemporary society, forms of economic rationality and market interaction tend to spread into many social areas.
These developments also affect the private sphere. As Eva Il- louz has shown, values and practices of consumer culture have increasingly en- tered the field of love — e. when people use consumer items and luxury goods to give their affective relationships a symbolic expression. Beside this, current developments in the sphere of work — e. But this blur- ring of boundaries also affects the realm of the market.
Specific resources from the pri- vate sphere — e. As a result, the relation between romantic love and the market is best described as a fundamental tension, which is both constitutive. The necessity to deal with this tension seems to be a constant struggle and a driving force for social change. We have interpreted this as a reinforcement of the romantic ideal because it strengthened the autonomy of love against external regulations and restrictions.
Historically, this development was supported by a much more general social move- ment which was searching for new forms of self-realization and social experiences not only in love and sexuality, but also in culture, community and economic life. Interesting enough, the Internet and other electronic communication devices have also been inter- preted in this direction — that is, as tools that widen the room for collective experiences and self-realization.
Referring — among others — to Marshall McLuhan , Rheingold was convinced of the possibility of such practices to reinforce the social, collective, and communitarian life.
He even hoped to improve sexuality by connecting people over the Internet Rheingold In a certain way, online dating practices also rely on this cultural and ideological framework.
Jupiter Research ; NZZ ; Schmid It is obvious that the idea of freedom in the choice of a partner, which was very important for the sociocultural transformations described above, plays a crucial role in the cultural framing of online dating, too.
One might even say that the Internet prom- ises to continue — on a technological level — the liberation in the process of couple forma- tion that started as a social movement in the late s.
It offers an enormous amount of choices and makes it easy to contact people from all over the world. At the same time, it creates a very private situation: Sitting alone in front of his or her computer, a person seems to be more or less out of reach from the usual mechanisms of social control family, colleagues, circle of friends that can be restrictive in other forms of dating.
Finally, online dating sites provide detailed information about. As we will see in the third part of this article, the promise of liberating and enlarging the possibilities for couple formation through the Internet can be very exciting and attrac- tive for people, although it is often hard to get this promise fulfilled.
The Internet as a neoromantic media Albeit there are many connections between sociocultural transformations in the field of love and the way online dating is interpreted and framed in our society, one thing is still irritating.
It has often been highlighted that this mediated interaction is charac- terized by the fact that it brings people to relate to each other beyond their immediate co- presence. Hence, those people do not share the same social and temporal frame. The dis- appearance of co-presence leads to some important consequences such as the less impor- tant role of the body in communication processes or the potentially anonymous nature of communication — aspects which, at first glance, seem to be completely contradictory to what we have outlined above as the main characteristics of the romantic ideal of love.
Additionally, all interactions in this space inevitably are mediated by technological inter- faces, thus any form of relation between two subjects must undergo the intermediary of digital platforms. Again, this seems totally contradictory to the specific immediacy of the relationship that the romantic ideal suggests. As a result, computer mediated communication has often been regarded as a widely depersonalized and de-emotionalized form of human interaction Döring et seqq.
Many classic views are based on the assumption that the reduction of communication channels in the text-based online conversation would lead to a certain kind of impersonality.
Given the fact that direct body language is completely absent and hard to be recreated in computer networks,it seems to be particularly difficult to convey emotions.. But it did not seem intended at all to build up intimate, close and long- term interpersonal relationships. The critics pointed to the fact that this emerging media has always been used not only for business or scientific purposes but also as a place to build up personal, intimate relationships Jones ; Walther For this form of intersubjectivity, mutual self-disclosure plays a crucial role, and the Internet fosters this in a particular way McKenna ; Joinson ; Ben-Ze'ev 34 et seqq.
What makes the Internet so particular is the fact that it combines elements from both constellations. On the one hand, users often see this media as a kind of secure space because they do not appear with their real names and have an easy-exit option anytime they want Thurlow et al. On the other hand, the mediation through digital interfaces can — quite different from what one might expect — also lead to feelings of closeness, intimacy, familiarity and trust.
The reason for this is that the reduced channels of online communication forces people to use their imagination to fill the informational gaps about the alter ego Walther As will be shown later on in greater details, this can lead to impressions of a particular closeness and familiarity in the relationship, which again augments the disposition for self-disclosure.
Voirol a. Obviously, some important elements are missing — especially that kind of visible and tactile experi- ence of the body which is strictly bound at face-to-face or body-to-body interaction Il- louz 95 et seqq. In part III of this article, we will have a closer look on the conse- quences of this absence — consequences that become especially problematic when the body comes into play as the relationship develops beyond the space of digital interfaces.
Following this tra- dition, the process of mate selection in general and online dating in particular is character-. Voirol: Online dating: The tensions between romantic love and economic rationalization ized as a form of market transaction where people exchange personal resources like edu- cation, social status, beauty, and so on, in order to maximize their individual utility. Common places for getting in contact with potential partners outside the net — bars, parties or university campuses, but also tra- ditional newspaper ads or dating agencies — have always been representing a very small portion of the partner market which, as a whole, stays invisible and abstract.
In contrast, online dating sites are confronting their users instantaneously with the whole universe of options that are at stake in mate selection. In fact, online dating sites address their users not only as romantic subjects, but also as economic actors who are looking for efficiency and a good bargain in mate selection Dröge It is the position of an economic agent who compares offers on a level of equivalence and tries to maximize his own interests.
But still, both the norms of the market and of the romantic ideal of love coincide in this field and people have to deal with the ambiguities and contradictions that arise from this. Dröge, Kai und Andrea Glauser Hg. Interdisziplinäre Analysen und Fallstudien. Frankfurt a. Dröge, Kai, Kira Marrs und Wolfgang Menz Hg. Leistung in Arbeit, Unternehmen und Gesellschaft.
Berlin: Sigma. Dröge, Kai Leistung? Nee, echt jetzt? Über die schwierige Wiederaneignung eines kritischen Konzepts, in: Sarah Lenz und Martina Hasenfratz Hg. Ökonomie, Ökologie, Kultur. Dröge, Kai Dating, in: Sebastian Schinkel, Fanny Hösel, Sina-Mareen Köhler u.
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